May 2nd 2013
I thought nothing has changed. I stepped out of my spiritual graduation with a sense that I was an imposter. In a room full of freshly graduated Yogi’s I was the one who has not moved a centimeter from the time I started 8 month ago to now… A beautiful, breezy San Antonio day, where spring just began unraveling all the wonders of a fresh season with aromas of youth, energy and vitality.
I felt saddened. I was back in a same spot emotionally, intellectually even as when I began. I was fighting off disappointment with a realization that I did in fact finish something great, but there was no feeling of any feasible depth associated with it…well, no feeling at all….Huh, I thought. Maybe this was my journey, to come full circle, not advance in an expanding spiral…I continued sharing the joy of my friends who have come to such a blossom, each and every one of them. I gave a speech on power within me, that I have discovered, and when I did, it was like a divine intervention, I felt like I was floating. I felt strong, free, and liberated, but when the ceremony was over I felt lost. Alone, confused by the same trail of thoughts, same patterns.
And I decided to wait.
And then. I transformed.